The Real Reason You Self-Sabotage

Written by Barbara Huson

Think about it. Aren’t all acts of self-sabotage really misguided attempts at self-protection?

Though very few of us see it that way.

Countless women come to me, chiding themselves unmercifully for sabotaging their success by making foolish decisions. Maybe you’ve done it too.

Spending more than you have. Avoiding what you know is important. Deferring decisions to another. Giving generously while depriving yourself.

Most of my adulthood was one giant act of financial self-sabotage. I avoided anything to do with money, giving my husband control, while I spent freely and gave generously.

A Sure-Fire Way to Increase Your Self Worth

Written by Barbara Huson

In my interviews, I always asked High Earners: “Are you doing what you’re doing for the money?”

“No”, they told me, quite vehemently. What drove them was passion, challenge, recognition. But not money, they insisted.

Yet, in the next breath, they all said the same thing. “But I damn well want to be well compensated…because I know I’m worth it!”

Where did their strong sense of self-worth come from, I initially wondered? As a chronic underearner, I wanted what they had. The answer soon became stunningly clear.

It turns out they all followed a simple strategy. Initially, they were afraid to speak up and tell the truth. But, at some point, they forced themselves to ask for what they wanted and say ‘no’ to what they didn’t want.

How Much Risk Can You Handle?

Written by Barbara Huson

With inflation still soaring and markets still turbulent, it’s a good time to discuss an important concept: Risk tolerance.

You’ve probably heard those words bandied about when talk turns to investing. But do you know what they mean?

Risk tolerance is generally defined as the ability to stomach large swings in the value of your investment portfolio. Because the market, by nature, is very volatile, understanding your risk tolerance is vital for making prudent decisions.

Here are 3 factors to help you figure out how much risk you can tolerate:

What the Hell is Robo-Investing? And Why Should I Care?

Written by Barbara Huson

In the beginning, I was skeptical…very skeptical. Now I’m a raging fan.

Robo-Investing is the best thing to happen for investors since index funds were invented.

In Robo-Investing, a computer—not a person—creates and manages a portfolio of index funds and ETFs. What are advantages for you, the investor?

The price is right. Fees are very low (0.15% to 0.50% compared to 1%-2% for human advisors). Plus there’s either no, or a very low, minimum required to open an account.

It’s easy to start. You fill out a short questionnaire to assess your situation, goals and risk tolerance, then choose among suggested portfolios based on your answers. That’s it…you’re ready to invest.

The 3 Questions. (Everything You Need to Know About Creating Wealth)

Written by Barbara Huson

I’ve recently had several thought-provoking conversations centered around three fundamental questions:

What is Wealth?
How do you create Wealth (without becoming a workaholic?)
Why is creating Wealth so scary?

Today, I’d like to share my perspective on these questions. Let’s begin with the first—what is wealth?

Simply put, Wealth is having more than you need…so money ceases to be a source of stress and becomes a tool for living life fully.

But like any tool, you must understand how to use it skillfully and wisely to get maximum benefit with minimum risk. Which brings us to the 2nd question.

All the Answers Aren’t ‘Out There’

Written by Barbara Huson

I spent most of my adult life desperately trying to figure out money. I had to. My husband was gambling it away at a rapid pace. So I dutifully went to classes, read books, talked to advisors. Nothing helped.

Then, something miraculous happened. When I began journaling about my frustration, I began to breakthrough my blocks.

As I’d write, I’d hear a familiar voice in my head telling me how stupid I was. Up until then, I just assumed that voice was right and there was nothing I could do.

But, this time, instead of letting that voice hold sway, as I always did, I decided to get to know it better. I asked the voice where it came from and what it wanted.

Taking Your Power Back

Written by Barbara Huson

Check if any of these apply to you:

You’re angry, but don’t say anything.
You’d like to say ‘no,’ but you can’t.
You want something, but don’t ask for it.
You get an idea but don’t act on it.

If you’ve checked even one, it’s a sign you’re giving your power away. And you’re not alone.

The question is: Why are so many women reluctant to say what we think, feel, or need?

My Career is a Major Success. My Finances are a Miserable Mess!

Written by Barbara Huson

“Research shows that suppression activates the amygdala in your brain, where your body’s fight of flight response resides. Suppression will make you more anxious in the long run and will have harmful effects on your health.” ~~Wall Street Journal

Years ago, I noticed a puzzling phenomenon. It’s far more prevalent today. I call it the Secret Shame of Successful Women.

Bright, sophisticated professionals, making ample incomes, who have little (if anything) in the bank to show for it.

These women look like the epitome of success—whip smart, business savvy, high earners—yet they can’t seem to manage their money.

They’re either too ashamed to reach out for help (I should be able to do this) or stubbornly resist taking action when they do (I have no time).

At first it didn’t make sense. You’d think they’d know better, right?

The Psychology of Affluence

Written by Barbara Huson

F. Scott Fitzgerald once said to Hemingway “The rich are different from you and me.” To which the other author replied: “Yes, they have more money.”

True. But let’s take it a step deeper. The reason the rich have more money, I believe, is that they think differently.

My family was wealthy. So were most of their friends. Over the years I’ve talked to thousands of affluent women.

One day, I made a list of things I consistently hear them say or imply.

I’m not talking about highly paid celebrities that go in and out of bankruptcy, but those who sustain their wealth over a long period. I came up with 9 common threads that seem to represent how they think.

Fear of Success? Or Fear of Power?

Written by Barbara Huson

She sat across the table, looking like the savvy businesswoman she was.

As we chatted over kale salads, she told me how her company, not yet two years old, was growing exponentially.

Then she lowered her voice and leaned in close. “There’s something I need to talk about. I’ve never shared this with anyone.”

“What is it?” I asked, also leaning forward. I could tell this was difficult for her.

“I’m afraid of success. I can already see little ways I’m holding myself back.”

When I asked what scared her, she replied, “I’m afraid people won’t like me. I’m afraid people will want more of me than I can give them. I’m scared it will all be too much.”

“You’re not afraid of success,” I responded. “You’re afraid of power. There’s a distinct difference.”

This conversation reveals a critical distinction that more women need to understand. Success is the outcome we desire to achieve. Power is what it takes to create this outcome.

Blog

The Real Reason You Self-Sabotage

A Sure-Fire Way to Increase Your Self Worth

How Much Risk Can You Handle?

What the Hell is Robo-Investing? And Why Should I Care?

The 3 Questions. (Everything You Need to Know About Creating Wealth)

All the Answers Aren’t ‘Out There’

Taking Your Power Back

My Career is a Major Success. My Finances are a Miserable Mess!

The Psychology of Affluence

Fear of Success? Or Fear of Power?

Meet Barbara Huson

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