Consciousness Raising While Holiday Shopping

Written by Barbara Huson

Tis the season to be spending. But splurging on presents is like binging at the buffet. Fun at first, but afterwards, you feel awful!

Let me suggest a simple tip to control your spending, without turning into a tightwad: Track your expenses.

Every time you buy anything—a gift, a latte or a mani/pedi—jot down the item and the amount…at the time of purchase. Otherwise, receipts pile up and it feels overwhelming.

Believe me, tracking is not just for those with limited means. Tracking is a powerful consciousness raising, potentially life changing tool. It reveals a lot more than where you can shave and save.

Thank You!

Written by Barbara Huson

I intended to write on a completely different topic. But as my hands hit the keys, I heard a voice in my head “If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you…that will be enough.”

I felt that Meister Eckhart was sending me a message (and maybe you too) which I imagined went like this: “Appreciate the abundance you have….and those who’ve made it possible. That alone will change your life.”

So today, in the spirit of Thanksgiving and a 13th century mystic, I’m taking this opportunity to say Thank You…

…to all of you who are reading this blog, even if it’s the only time you ever do, I truly appreciate you reading it today.

…to everyone who’s ever written to tell me how my work has impacted your life, you have no idea how your words have impacted mine. In fact, I have printed out and saved every one of your notes and emails.

Navigating the Chaos of Uncertainty

Written by Barbara Huson

I once saw a cartoon of a frog leaping from one lily pad to another. There’s a look of sheer terror on her face as she realizes she’s about to miss the lily pad. The caption read: Just when you think you’ve made ends meet, someone moves an end.

I suspect that millions of people are feeling a lot like that. Maybe you’re one of them. Poised midair between the old and the new, wondering “What do I do now?”

Welcome to the Age of Massive Uncertainty. The pandemic has played havoc with our lily pads. The present is unfamiliar. The future is unpredictable. Your sense of security is shattered. It feels like nothing’s happening, you’re going nowhere.

Many will do anything to avoid uncertainty. As humans, we yearn for the certainty of solid ground. We’ll numb our anxiety with alcohol or overwork. Or rush head-first into a new job, another relationship.

Yet uncertainty has a powerful purpose. It’s not an empty time. It’s a fallow time, a moratorium, a vital phase in the transition process.

Using Failure to Achieve Greatness

Written by Barbara Huson

Did you hear about the MBA program offering a course on how to fail? Students are graded on how they handle setbacks in class projects. Classmates are encouraged to boo presentation they don’t like. Guest speakers recount stories of personal failures.

Why aren’t there more courses like that? As inventor Charles Kettering noted, “Failing is one of the greatest arts in the world.”

Failure, an art??? Not in today’s world! With the emphasis on productivity, failure must be avoided at all costs.

How shortsighted. Trying to avoid messing up is a sure path to mediocrity. But those aiming for Greatness never shy away from possible defeat.

Henry Ford, Colonel Sanders, Walt Disney all went broke at least once before amassing millions. Lincoln lost 7 elections before becoming president. Einstein flunked math. Babe Ruth struck out 1330 times, more than any other major league player. Elvis Presley was fired from the Grand Ole Opry.

Professionally Successful – Financially Strapped! Oh My!

Written by Barbara Huson

On the outside, she had it all together. A successful entrepreneur who made loads of money, dressed exquisitely, and lived in luxury.

But every morning she woke up feeling like “there’s ground glass in my gut.” Under her polished veneer, she was drowning in debt.

“I am making good money, but I have nothing to show for it,“ she told me. “I’m broke but nobody knows it.”

Our successful entrepreneur represents a raging epidemic—people who are professionally successful but financially strapped.

Most experts advocate budgeting as the best solution. But she had tried repeatedly to follow a budget, only to fail miserably.

The truth is, will power alone is never enough to stop compulsive behaviors. Because money isn’t the problem, but a symptom of something deeper.

Practicing Radical Self-Acceptance

Written by Barbara Huson

All my life, I’ve been a self-improvement junkie. Show me a seminar touting personal growth and it was like throwing raw meat to a ravenous lion. I’d hungrily pounce on it.

But then life went into lockdown, removing a myriad of distractions. That’s when I noticed something disturbing—how brutally critical I am of me. This wasn’t a new insight, of course, but I began to see how awful it felt.

So, I made a conscious decision. Rather than pushing myself to improve, I decided to practice Radical Self-Acceptance, loving myself, warts and all…especially the warts.

Don’t get me wrong. I still aspire to be better. But I’m finding a remarkable sense of freedom and well-being as I learn to fully embrace my shortcomings and my strengths, my achievements and my failures, without fear or false humility, without shame or recrimination.

Overcoming Financial Paralysis

Written by Barbara Huson

I was newly divorced, raising 3 daughters, when I got tax bills for over $1m. My ex was responsible, but he left the country…leaving me with very little in the bank. My father refused to lend me the money. I was angry and terrified. I had no choice. I had to get smart about money.

I tried going to classes, reading books, but nothing made sense. I felt immobilized. Nowhere in those books or classes could I find a solution for my paralysis. Until I took matters in my own hands.

I stopped focusing on the practical mechanics of money and started plumbing the deepest recesses of my psyche. Writing in my journal proved profoundly revealing.

I became aware of a familiar voice that kept telling me how stupid I was. Instead of ignoring it or letting it hold sway, as I always did, I began a dialogue with that voice, asking it where it came from and what it wanted.

I immediately heard my father telling me, often and in no uncertain terms, that managing money was a man’s job. As a woman, I did not have what it took to deal with finances.

So of course, I was terrified that if I tried to take charge, I’d botch things badly, blow it all.

What Will Your Legacy Be?

Written by Barbara Huson

I once saw a poster that made a lasting impact. On it was written: Will it matter that I was?

I recognized, in that instant, that I was on earth for a reason. I hadn’t a clue what it was, but I was hell-bent on finding it.

Every one of us leaves a legacy, but in my experience, surprisingly few reflect on what they want theirs to be. Yet, it’s an important point for us all to ponder.

I remember reading an article by a hospice physician about how many of her patients were “deeply disturbed” because they hadn’t “contributed anything significant to life.”

She had a profound realization: “It is far better to contemplate the meaning of life when we actually have some time left to work on the question.”

If you haven’t already, now is the time to contemplate your legacy. How? Ask yourself ‘What do I want my obituary to say?’

The Secret to Investing Wisely–Understand the Investment Pyramid

Written by Barbara Huson

Let me introduce you to the Investment Pyramid. Understanding this pyramid was a game changer for me.

Decades ago, a wealthy family friend urged me to invest in a Limited Partnership, calling it a “an exciting opportunity.”

I didn’t know that a Limited Partnership was illiquid and I couldn’t sell my shares, even as I watched the company go bust.

When I told my accountant this story, he drew a triangle, divided it into 4 levels, explaining this represented the whole world of investing. My mistake was starting at the top.

To Earn More, Learn to Toughen Up (Without Hardening Your Heart)

Written by Barbara Huson

By nature, we women tend to be pleasers. We want everyone to like us.

High earners are no different. Almost every six-and seven-figure woman I’ve interviewed confessed to a “little girl inside me who wants to be liked.”

But financial success requires us to make difficult, even painful decisions that often have negative consequences for others—like firing folks you like, holding tight in tense negotiations, enforcing an unpopular policy, dismissing high paying but difficult clients, enduring multiple rejections and disappointments.

So many women I interviewed regretted not making those tough decisions sooner. As one told me: “I kept trying to be nice. Eventually I had to toughen up.”

Toughening up doesn’t mean you have to harden your heart, numb your senses, or act all macho.

Toughening up does require a dramatic shift in mindset, which sounds like this: I’d rather be respected than liked.

Life Lessons

Consciousness Raising While Holiday Shopping

Thank You!

Navigating the Chaos of Uncertainty

Using Failure to Achieve Greatness

Professionally Successful – Financially Strapped! Oh My!

Practicing Radical Self-Acceptance

Overcoming Financial Paralysis

What Will Your Legacy Be?

The Secret to Investing Wisely–Understand the Investment Pyramid

To Earn More, Learn to Toughen Up (Without Hardening Your Heart)

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