Life Lessons
Stone Heart

6 Things To Do Before Your Spouse Dies

I’ll never forget the day I asked my mother, “Do you know what Dad has planned for you when he dies?”  He was seriously ill. She was having a hard time.

“Of course I do,” she replied. But when I pressed her for details, she couldn’t deliver.

But she made it abundantly clear: This was not a conversation she wanted to have.  I made it even clearer:  Avoidance was not an option.  Here’s what we did:

1. We had “The Talk.” I made my Mom sit down with my Dad and we looked at all the financial documents:  bank statements, investments, estate planning, etc.  This was not, by any means, an easy conversation.  Nerves were frayed.  My Mom glazed over.  My Dad lost patience.  I kept scratching my wrist (a nervous habit) until it bled.  But by the end, my Mom knew where every penny was and what arrangements he had (and hadn’t) made.

The Only Antidote for Fear

 It’s hard not to freak out these days. Between all the political hostility, global wars, and precarious economy, how’s a girl supposed to stay positive and avoid panicking? It’s a question I’ve been asking myself a lot lately.

Then I remembered a helpful antidote to fear that I once assigned participants during a retreat I gave. I asked them to keep a Receiving Journal. I did it too.

Writing in a Receiving Journal serves the same purpose as tracking your spending. But instead of increasing your awareness of money going out, a Receiving Journal forces you to face all the abundance flowing in.

 As A Course of Miracles tells us: “Every day a thousand treasures come to me with every passing moment.”  The problem, however, is that we fail to notice those frequent treasures, especially when fear is ever-present.  

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A Valentine Letter to My Money

My dearest Money,

Happy Valentines Day to the most perfect lover I could ever imagine. You have served, supported and protected me so beautifully as I’ve grown older. And for that, I owe you my deepest gratitude.

But I admit it wasn’t always that way. Consider this my long overdue apology.

I know I haven’t made it easy for us to be together. For years, I neglected you. You seemed so confusing and frightening. Sure, I tried to get to know you, but I always got scared and gave up.

When you finally left, it was a devastating blow. Yet it was also a gift.

During our separation, I realized how much I wanted you to love and take care of me. But I also realized, for that to happen, I had to love and take care of you too.

Living with Uncertainty 

Transitions are a bitch.  And so many in my community are in the midst of one right now.  As I listen to their frustration and confusion, I’m reminded of a cartoon:

A frog is leaping from one lily pad to another with a look of sheer terror as he realizes he’s about to miss his target. The caption read: ‘Just when you think you’ve made ends meet, someone moves an end.

That’s exactly how it feels to be in transition—whether it’s a conscious choice (like taking a sabbatical) or an unwelcomed disruption (like being laid off). You’re poised mid-air between the old and the new, wondering “what do I do now?’

I remember my first big transition, back in the 80’s, when I moved from the Midwest to San Francisco…a dream come true. But as soon as I settled in, I felt untethered, disoriented, anxious. This wasn’t what I expected.

Thankfully, I discovered the book Transitions: Making sense of Life’s Changes by Bill Bridges. It was a godsend!

bullseye

The 5 Truths of Feminine Power

Writing my second book, Secrets of Six Figure Women, changed my life. I, a chronic underearner actually became a high earner. Even better, I finally understood how to own my power, as a woman.

I want that for you too. My deepest desire is to help as many women as possible step firmly into their power. It’s time. The world needs us. To that end, I share the 5 Truths of Feminine Power.

Truth #1. I Know What I Want

Our power comes from the choices we make, choices that reflect who we are, not what someone else wants. Start by asking yourself: What do I really want? Then go deeper: If I had 6 months to live, what would I do, who would I be with, where would I live? And know that if this list doesn’t come close to where you are now and you’re unhappy, it’s a sign you’ve given your power away.

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Prince Charming Isn’t Coming—But 2024 Can Still Be Your Year of Wealth!

Take a guess. What’s the most popular new year’s resolution for 2024? Yep, you got it. According to a variety of sources from Forbes to CNBC, we all want more money.

As a wealth coach, it’s the #1 reason women have come to me for over 30 years. “I need more money,” they tell me.

“It’s so simple,“ I tell them. “All you have to do is spend less, save more, invest wisely.” 

“But I need to make more,” they tell me.

Then I explain that wealth doesn’t come from what you earn, but from what you keep, which requires following those 3 steps.

But I’m the first to admit; while the steps may be simple and straight forward, actually putting them into practice can be extremely challenging.

My “Ambitious” Challenge for 2024. Want to Join Me?

I’ve taken on an Ambitious Challenge for 2024. Well, it’s actually not ‘ambitious’ in the conventional sense.

In fact, most would say it was the exact opposite. But if you feel spiritually adventurous, I invite you to join me.

I call it the No-Goals Challenge. Here’s why I’m doing it…

Anna, my youngest daughter, and I have a “God Box” ritual we do every January 1st. We write down our goals for the year on slips of paper. Then we read each one aloud as we drop them in our God Box, deliberately giving those goals up to the Divine.

My New Year’s Prayer for You

Here is my prayer for the new year: May you, along with all women, realize that you have the capacity to create wealth and the confidence to actually do it.

I suspect, however, for some of you, the mere mention of the “W” word feels wrong, bad, like ‘how can I be rich when so many are poor?’ But consider the words of Abraham Lincoln: “If you want to help a poor person, do not be one.”

Let me be clear. Wealth is not an amount. It’s a mindset. You’re wealthy when you have more than enough, and you know it.  

Besides, creating wealth is about far more than amassing riches. It’s about who you have to become to attract, sustain and grow your money.

Ultimately, creating wealth requires you to wake up to the power you have, the enormous power, to not only create wealth but to use it to help others, to make a difference.

Feather falling into outstretched hand

The Gospel of Rumi 

Yoga class began with the teacher saying, “Hold out your hands to receive something you truly desire.” 

 As we extended our hands, palms up, he softly quoted Rumi: ‘What you seek is seeking you.” 

I, with arms outstretched, stood transfixed. 

What if that were true? What if my desire is heading towards me like a heat seeking missile?)? What if (gasp!) I no longer needed to struggle?

It felt farfetched, but during Downward Dog, I made a decision.  I’m taking Rumi’s words as gospel truth.  

As I sank into Child’s Pose, I remembered a poster that once hung in my office with a quote from Richard Bach: “You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true.” Then, in tiny letters: “You may have to work for it, however.” 

My Only Prayer… 

I intended to write on a completely different topic. But as my hands hit the keys, I heard a voice in my head whisper:  If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you…that will be enough.” 

I felt that Meister Eckhart was sending me a message (and maybe you too) which I imagined went like this:  Appreciate the abundance you have….and those who’ve made it possible. That alone will change your life.” 

So today, in the spirit of Thanksgiving and a 13th century mystic, I’m taking this opportunity to say Thank You…  

Meet Barbara Huson

When a devastating financial crisis rocked her world, Barbara Huson knew she had to get smart about money… and she did. Now, she wants to empower every women to take charge of their money and take charge of their lives! She’s doing just that with her best-selling books, life changing retreats and private financial coaching.

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