Mind Training

Thank You!

Today, in the spirit of Thanksgiving, I’m taking this opportunity to say Thank You…

…to all of you who are reading this blog, even if it’s the only time you ever do, I truly appreciate you reading it today.

…to everyone who’s ever written to tell me how my work has impacted your life, you have no idea how your words have impacted mine. In fact, your notes and emails are tucked in a box beside my desk.

…to anyone who’s bought my books and perhaps passed it onto a friend, this means more to me than you can ever know.

…to those of you who’ve joined my groups or signed up for coaching, I’m endlessly grateful you trusted me to guide you while teaching me to be a better guide.

…to my amazing team—Lynda Jo, Carney, Jayme & Ben—for taking care of all the details I abhor and for supporting me in such a deeply loving way. I really would be lost without each of you.

…to my ex who gambled away my inheritance and my father who wouldn’t lend me money, you taught me that, indeed, the obstacle is the path, leading me straight to my life’s purpose.

…to my wonderful financial team, because despite current events, my portfolio has more than doubled since I first found you.

…to McGraw Hill, the publisher who said yes to my latest book, when all the other said no.

…to my kids and grandkids who are coming to spend Thanksgiving with us. Truly, my cup runneth over.

…to my beloved husband who rarely lets a day pass without expressing his love, appreciation and support for me.

Once again, from the bottom of my heart…THANK YOU ALL!

I’d love to know who’d you like to thank this holiday season. Leave me a comment below.

My Journey Through Fear (Thanks to A Course in Miracles)

I’ve always been an upbeat person.  But these past months have cast a dark pall over my positive attitude. I’ve been feeling fragile, fearful, unsettled.

Finally it dawned on me. I need to surrender in stillness to receive guidance from a higher wisdom.

Almost immediately, a lesson from A Course in Miracles came to mind—You can see peace instead of this.

Huh??? How can I possibly see peace in a world filled with frightening and depressing events?

But I remember the Course’s primary teaching.  Our minds have two “thought systems” or two distinct voicesthe voice of fear (Ego) and the voice of love (Soul). “There is no compromise between the two.”

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Investing During a Pandemic…Isn’t it too Risky?

Yes we’re in a pandemic. Yes, investing now may feel very risky. But understanding risk is what makes you wealthy. And so few people actually get it.

You want to know your most dangerous risk? It’s not the market’s gyrations. It’s your emotional reactions.

The emerging field of neurofinance has proven that most investors, regardless of gender, tend to act on emotions, not rational thinking, when making financial decisions.

The reason? Our brain registers risk even before we’re conscious of it. Consequently we tend to make rash decisions that rarely end well, even if we know better.

So when markets take a tumble, our emotions, especially fear, take over. And we make very bad decisions. It also happens in reverse.

Don’t Let Your Brain Be The Boss!

Quick. Pick one. Which would you rather have: (A) Higher earnings or (B) More in savings?

I’m guessing you went for (A). Most people do. We tend to be far more concerned with increasing our income rather than growing our net worth. But hey, it’s not our fault. That’s how our brain is wired.

A recent Cornell University study discovered that our brains are biased toward earning and against saving. Perhaps it’s the immediate gratification our paychecks offer while socking away savings feels about as gratifying as watching grass grow

“Fundamentally it comes down to this,” the study reported. “Saving is less valuable to our brains, which devote less attentional resources to it. Our brains find saving more difficult to attend to.”

If ever there was a strong case for rewiring our brains, this is it. Fixating on earnings can be fool hardy. I call it the Illusion of Affluence. I see it all the time with successful women. Their significant earnings give them the illusion, but not the security, of true abundance.

It’s a fact. Wealth doesn’t come from what you earn. Wealth comes from what you save. But wait…getting rich isn’t the only reason to be a saver.

Consider the title of a 2016 study: “How Your Bank Balance Buys Happiness: The Importance of “Cash on Hand” to Life Satisfaction.” This study, as reported in What the Elle (my favorite financial newsletter), found that higher savings is a better predictor of happiness and well-being than hefty incomes.

Add to that the result of the 2018 Ellevest Census: “The #1 confidence booster for women is saving and investing (63% of women ranked it over things like salary and education).

The message is clear. Don’t let your brain be the boss. Instead, train your mind to rewire your brain to focus on savings rather than obsessing about earnings. (If you haven’t read my free ebook, The Rewire Response, you can get on this page.)

Which would you choose: (A) A big fat paycheck or (B) lots of money set aside? Leave me a comment and tell me why.

The Real Reason You Self-Sabotage

Think about it. Aren’t all acts of self-sabotage really misguided attempts at self-protection? Though very few see it that way.

Countless women come to me, chiding themselves unmercifully for sabotaging their success by making foolish decisions. Maybe you’ve done it too.

Spending more than you have. Avoiding what you know is important. Deferring decisions to another. Giving generously while depriving yourself.

Most of my adulthood was one giant act of financial self-sabotage. I avoided anything to do with money, giving my husband control, while I spent freely and gave generously.

Even after my divorce, I continued to ignore money. Until I got tax bills for over a million dollars…for back taxes my ex didn’t pay, illegal deals he got us in.

I was furious at my ex, who quickly left the country. Furious at my dad, who wouldn’t lend me the money. But most of all, furious at myself for being so irresponsible.

Beware of Always Wanting More

I’ve spent most of my life yearning for more…more money, more success, more sales, the list goes on.

I proudly considered my perpetual wanting a healthy sign of a robust ambition. Until I began studying neuroscience and realized how truly unhealthy this kind of thinking actually is.

Here’s why: We literally sculpt our brain by what we dwell on. The more we think a thought or feel an emotion, the stronger that neuropathway becomes in our brain.

By constantly hungering for more, I was inadvertently telling my brain “I don’t have enough.”

The more I repeated that thought, the stronger the “not enough” neuropathway grew, until I’d unconsciously do things that kept reinforcing my experience of ‘not enough.’

Slowly it dawned on me. How can I expect more, if I was repeatedly focused on what I had not yet attained? Clearly, I needed to shift my focus to rewire my brain.

I decided to experiment. Every time I felt myself coveting anything, I stopped, took note and shifted into appreciation for what I currently had.

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Your Brain on Savings

There’s actually a positive side to being stuck at home. Personal savings have skyrocketed. But my guess is that when the pandemic passes, savings will plummet.

The fault may lie in our brains.

A recent study by Cornell University neuroscientists discovered that our brains are biased toward earning and against saving. Perhaps it’s the immediate gratification our paychecks offer while putting aside small amounts feels about as gratifying as watching grass grow.

“Fundamentally it comes down to this: saving is less valuable to our brains, which devote less attentional resources to it,” said the co-author Adam Anderson. “Our brains find saving more difficult to attend to.”

Yet fixating on earnings can be fool hardy. I call it the Illusion of Affluence. I see it all the time. Successful women spending too much, saving too little, plowing all profits back into their businesses or on classes for personal growth (deceptively calling it “an investment”).

Their ample earnings gives them the illusion, but not the security of true abundance. The real measure of wealth is your net worth…not what you earn but what you keep.

My Journey Through Fear

I had a rough few days.

As I watch the world implode, the virus surge, the markets plunge — my doctor tells me I need cataract surgery. Anything with the eyes terrifies me.

My head fills with worse case scenarios. I fall into a very dark place, unable to find my way out.

Then I remember what A Course in Miracles calls “the most important concept that exists in the universe—”the Law of Cause and Effect.”

The Course explains this law very differently from the world’s more generally accepted Newtonian explanation.

Here’s What Really Needs to Change

Am I the only one feeling this way?

Yes, the protests—peaceful or not—have led to incredible changes. Companies are hiring more blacks. Communities are implementing radical police reforms. The shares in black-owned businesses are soaring.

But to create true and lasting equality, we must look beyond the external. To change the collective, we need to transform the individual.

I say this from experience.

I came of age during Women’s Lib. Enraged by rampant discrimination, we took to the streets, burning our bras, demanding gender equality. And lo and behold, the workplace opened its doors, albeit a crack. The banks gave us credit cards without requiring a man’s signature.

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Feeling Like an Imposter? Time to Rewire

I just read that award-winning Maya Angelou, after publishing her 11th book, thought to herself: “Uh-oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody.”

Can you imagine Maya Angelo feeling like fraud!! But looking back, I think of all the  courageous, confident, highly successful women I’ve interviewed who told me they still felt like a fraud long after their careers were flourishing.

Sadly, the imposter syndrome is epidemic among women, even the most successful ones. In Neuroscience, I found a possible explanation as to why. Despite their achievements, these women never rewired their old belief systems.

They didn’t prepare themselves mentally as they pushed themselves physically. Because they hadn’t changed their thoughts, their brains remained wired to see only the past.

Their low self-image hadn’t caught up with their incredible successes. Their old neuropathways still dictated their current perceptions.

The moral of this story:  before you focus on changing your behavior, you must transform the causes of that behavior—your thoughts and beliefs. 

What thoughts and behaviors could you begin to rewire for success? Leave me a comment below.


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Meet Barbara Huson

When a devastating financial crisis rocked her world, Barbara Huson knew she had to get smart about money… and she did. Now, she wants to empower every women to take charge of their money and take charge of their lives! She’s doing just that with her best-selling books, life changing retreats and private financial coaching.

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