Sacred Success Category
Water View

Letting Go

“For better to come, good must stand aside.” Carl Jung

I saw the above quote by Carl Jung when I was living in Kansas City, raising two little girls, running a thriving career counseling firm. Business was hopping, but I wasn’t happy. I was longing to live near water and write.

This made no sense at all. I’d never written anything. And there was no water in KC (at least none that I’d want to live near!). Why would I give up a flourishing business, uproot my kids, leave behind a network of friends and reliable babysitters?

That’s when Jung spoke to me. I instantly knew those words were meant for me. It was time to give up ‘good.’ Something ‘better’ was waiting to enter.

The moment I decided to give up my business, someone on my staff offered to buy it. Within 6 months I was living on the side of a hill, outside San Francisco, overlooking water. Then, out of the blue, a national magazine asked me to write a monthly career column. And they paid me!!! I was officially a writer.

Seven books later and still living on the water (now in Washington state), I have enormous respect for the power of Letting Go. And the scarier it is to release, the more magical the results.


If you enjoyed these “Words of Wealth”, head over to my website and sign-up for my FREE weekly newsletter at: www.barbarastanny.com

Women Eating

What do Money & Food Have in Common?

I’ve long noticed that women who have problems with money often have problems with food.

Then I read Geneen Roth’s extraordinary book, Women Food and God, a New York Time’s bestseller. She confirmed my suspicion. I’ve never met Geneen personally, but I consider her a kindred spirit.
 
She insists that food is never the problem, just as I know problems with money are never about money.

Rather, says Geneen, overeating is “a doorway to your true nature,” echoing my belief that “financial problems are a doorway to your true power.”
 
Roth’s book, like my Sacred Success®, is based on her own unhealthy relationship with food and her experience teaching others what she learned during her weekend retreats.  Her method of healing women’s relationship with food, similar to mine, mixes a hefty dose of spirituality with practical action and emotional transparency.
 
The key to success is not to focus exclusively on dieting…or budgeting.  Instead, success comes from following a process that includes self-awareness exercises and specific practices to help women step into their power and overcome the urge to self-sabotage and other compulsive behaviors, like chronic busyness, over eating, binge spending.
 
In fact, my favorite quote of all time is a quote from Geneen which I saw on Facebook: “The only people who don’t have insane relationships with money are those who were willing to examine their insane relationship with money.”

Gosh, I wish I had said that!


If you enjoyed these “Words of Wealth”, head over to my website and sign-up for my FREE weekly newsletter at: www.barbarastanny.com

Do the Hard Work Do The Scary Stuff

Want More $uccess? Do the Scary Stuff!

Whenever you decide to do something different — whether it’s making money or losing weight—the desired result always lies just outside your Comfort Zone.

The only way you’ll succeed is by stretching beyond what feels comfortable to what may seem impossible.

The stretch carries with it this strict stipulation: Feel the fear, endure the discomfort, observe the resistance, and go for it anyway.

From this day forward, find ways to stretch on a regular basis.

The stretch is not about eliminating fear. It’s about acting in spite of it. You are training yourself to surpass former limitations.

Coming Out of The Closet…Yikes!

As a writer, I’ve been torn by conflicting goals.  A big part of me wants everyone’s approval. Another part yearns to speak my truth. To me, the two have been mutually exclusive.

Ever since the 80’s, when I began writing a weekly column in the San Francisco Business Journal that was syndicated in over 30 large newspapers, I’ve always couched my unconventional views in acceptable verbiage.

Slowly, over time,  I’ve been dipping my toes in the waters of transparency, outing myself a little bit at a time.

But, I finally did it! I swung the door open and stepped out of the closest…almost all the way!  I wrote about Sacred Success® in the traditional media, on Forbes.com. (Women, Wealth, and Power: The Emerging Paradigm)

Sure, I’ve talked about Sacred Success® on my website, in my Money Monday Calls, and various social media.

But you’re my peeps. You’re safe.  I’ve never discussed it in such a public forum, with a much larger audience, many I suspect to be very conservative.

The response has been overwhelming. The article has been shared more times online, generated more email, than anything I’ve ever written.

In the article, I describe The Feminine Face of Financial Success…how women today are playing a very different game than the world (read: men) models…a  game  I call Sacred Success®.

Men are very driven by profit, perks, and prestige. Not women.  Once a woman is financially secure, she’s rarely motivated by money.  What drives her is an added spiritual component, a deep commitment to a higher purpose—how she can achieve Greatness by helping others, while still being richly rewarded.

I suspect the few men who responded didn’t quite get the point. But the women…oh the women loved it.  In exposing myself, I gave them permission to do the same!!

“It warms my heart to think about all the other women who, like me, want to make a difference while leading a healthy and wealthy life,” wrote one woman, echoing the sentiment of many.

If this idea warms your heart as well, if you desire to find other women who feel the same,  I invite you to consider attending one of my Sacred Success® Retreats. I hold two retreats each year—one on the east coast and one on the west coast.

In this 4 day Retreat,  I gather a small group of decidedly committed women, teach you the Feminine Formula for Financial Success and create a community that imbues each other with a deep sense of mission, a plan of action for wildly succeeding,and follow up support for at least a year.

It’s far more than a seminar. It’s a ground breaking paradigm shift. Will you join me?

The Gift of Pneumonia

Let me fill you in on what’s been happening since my last blog.

I’ve been practicing the principles of Sacred Success®.  And let me tell you, it’s made a huge difference in my life.

Take for example, how my year began…with a nasty case of Pneumonia that wouldn’t respond to antibiotics.

I had just hired a highly skilled team. We set a series of deadlines….none of which I’d be able to meet.

BSS (Before Sacred Success®), I would’ve gone into a tizzy of ‘why me,’ bemoaning my bad luck, angry over the distractions, feeling like a looser

But instead of cursing the circumstances, I looked through the lens of Sacred Success®.

What I saw:  it was time to Surrender.  I knew Surrender was critical to Sacred Success®. But, hey,  I already did it (see Sweet ? Surrender).

However, as I was learning, Surrender  is not a one (or two) time event, but an ongoing occurrence.

Sacred Success® is an intricate dance of moving forward in Disciplined Action, then stepping back in Receptive Surrender.  The signs indicating when to change steps are subtle at first. Clearly I wasn’t paying attention.

Pneumonia forced me to cancel everything.    And, as Sacred Success® insists,  I did so without judgment.

In Sacred Success®, nothing is ‘bad’ or ‘good’; ‘positive’ or  ‘negative.’  Everything  that happens is a source of information regarding our next step.

As I began mining the pneumonia for the message it had for me,  I quickly stumbled on the Mother Lode.

“I’m actually enjoying doing what I never let myself do…stay in bed,” I wrote in my journal.

Here’s what was amazing.  Even while bed ridden, I was still quite productive. I designed a new course, reworked copy on my website, had some fabulous conversations, attracted several amazing opportunities, took on new coaching clients. All in my pjs, punctuated with long periods of rest, happy as can be.

Then I realized what happened:  As soon as  I created my team, I slipped into busyness. It’s what I always do when I get focused.

Unconsciously, I’ve just assumed building a business meant crammed calendars, constant motion, lack of freedom, pressure to produce. No wonder, at some point, I always burned out…or lost interest.

But, I wondered, how do you play full out without going into over-drive?

My Pneumonia gave me another option and the permission to pursue it.  The message: It’s ok to be still, to block out lots of  unstructured time. It’s good for my creativity!

Guess what happened when I shared this finding with each member of my team, asking for their support in preserving my downtime?  My health began to improve.

Believe me, it hasn’t been easy. Maintaining blank space goes against my very nature, like a shark whose internal sonar system won’t let it stop swimming.

But this time, I want to be productive from a state of rest and peace, not from intensity and frenzy.

I’ll keep you posted on how it’s working!

Yikes! I Can’t Possibly Take Time OFF!!!

“There is no need to learn through pain” ~~A Course in Miracles

 

I wonder how many of you are craving some down time, a chance to step off the treadmill, but just can’t seem to swing it?

That’s where I was 2 years ago.

I remember saying to my guy, with a heavy sigh: “I wish I could take the next month off.”

“Why don’t you?” he responded.

I gasped! How could I possibly do that? I had all these “important” things to do!! Taking time off was unthinkable.

Then it hit me. I’d been interviewing women who made millions (my next goal) and saw something I never expected.

Right before these women soared, each one sank into a period of nothing happening, a time between, a void, often as a result of a crisis, like a devastating illness or painful loss.

These time-outs served an essential role in their eventual triumphs because they used them, as one woman put it, ‘to regroup and come back stronger.”

At that moment, I decided I wasn’t going to wait for a crisis. I could choose to step off the grid…by design, not default.

I invite you to do the same. Especially if you’ve had this nagging sense you need some down time.

I took 4 days off, going to a nearby hotel where I spent the entire time in self reflection.  It was during this time I discovered Sacred Success®.

Believe me, I had no idea a whole new body of work was living inside me, waiting for me to slow down and tune in.

Maybe it’s time for you to slow down and tune in too. That’s why I created a Sacred Success® Retreat, as a way to give women a structured  time out to go within.

If you can only take a day off, or even a few hours, that will work too. And you don’t need to go anywhere.

The whole idea is to eliminate distractions, do only what’s essential, connect with your inner wisdom and listen to what it has to say. (For more info, read my blog: The Beginner’s Guide to Surrender.)

You might be surprised with what you discover.  If you’d like to share, I’m all ears!

 

The Official Playbook for Sacred Success™

In my last blog (Somebody’s Got to Say No), I pointed out the 6 differences between the Male Model and the Feminine Formula for doing business in the world.

The Feminine Formula is what Sacred Success™ is all about!

Want to hear more? Let this blog be your Official Playbook for Sacred Success®. I’ve blogged about most of this before, but now it’s all in one place. If you desire to read more, follow the links.

First, there are 2 Prerequisites before you’re ready to play Sacred Success™:

  1. Financial Stability— you have a reliable steady income and no unpaid credit card debt. (Read more, Ready to Start Getting Smart)
  2. Stretching Past Fear — fear is never an excuse to stop, but a signal to act and the direction to move (towards the fear). (Read more, More on Greatness)

With these two intact, you’re ready to play Sacred Success. Here are the 6 Ground Rules.

  1. Understand the Paradox of Sacred Success— To achieve financial stability you needed a strong profit motive. But once stable, profit is no longer the primary goat. The primary goal of Sacred Success™ is Greatness, pursuing your soul’s purpose for your own bliss and the benefit of others. (Read more, The Paradox of Sacred Success.)
  2. Clarify your highest purpose— Since Sacred Success is purpose driven, you need to know what your purpose is. This can only be found in stillness and self reflection, which requires abstaining from busyness (most women’s drug of choice), carving out quiet time, and adopting a state of receptive surrender. (Read more, How to Pinpoint Your Purpose).
  3. Practice self respect— Putting yourself first must be your top priority, (which is what self respect is all about). Otherwise, your desire to help others will dissolve into co-dependency. Nurturing yourself — physically, mentally, spiritually — often requires concerted discipline. (Read more, What’s Keeping You from Greatness).
  4. Exercise Discipline— Disciplined action comes from disciplined thinking. Be vigilant for your value, do the “tough stuff”, give up wanting to be liked in order to be respected, think strategically, closely monitor the bottom line, and play to your strengths while delegating your deficiencies. (Read more, The “D” Word)
  5. Create teams— Success never happens in isolation. Put together collaborative teams to inspire, support and guide you in all areas of your life: work, health, wealth, and emotional support (I call this last team my “love nest”).
  6. Model greatness by leaving a legacy— give considerable thought, along with time and money, to making your mark on the world by making a difference for others. (Read more, The Talk)

I’d love to hear your comments. What do you think about this new game???

 

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Somebody’s Got To Say No!!!

Put me on record for saying NO!

NO to the way the “Old Boys” are playing!   No to the mess they got us in (and not just in the financial sector).

But I’m also saying “YES!” (No point dwelling on the downside.)

YES to the other game I learned from interviewing women making millions. These women achieved mega success playing a very different game from what the world (read: men) models.

It’s the game I’ve come to call Scared Success™.  It’s the game we women (and many enlightened men) were born to play!

What breaks my heart, however, is that too many of us futilely struggle to follow the old rules, without realizing we have another option.

Briefly, here’s 6 differences between the Male Model and the Feminine Formula (which is the basis for Scared Success™ ).

Male Model                                                                           Feminine Formula

1.  Pursue Profit for Profit’s sake 1. Pursue Profit for a Higher Purpose
2.  Push Yourself (and Everyone Else) 2.  Respect Yourself (and Everyone Else)
3.  Plan and Control 3.  Surrender, Allow Uncertainty
4.  Display Entitlement 4.  Exercise Mental Discipline
5.  Create Teams, Control Them 5.  Create Teams, Inspire Them
6.  Leave a Personal Monument to Your Name 6.  Leave a Legacy for the World

 

In my next blog, I’ll give you the specific ground rules for applying the Feminine Formula to the new game Scared Success™ . Meanwhile, I’m really curious what you think about these differences. Please comment below.

 

Greatness or Mediocrity? A Matter of Mindset.

Mediocrity sees difficulty in every opportunity. Greatness sees opportunity in every difficulty. (paraphrasing Winston Churchill)

Since September, I’ve kept in touch with the graduates of my last Sacred Success® Retreat.  Part of the curriculum is a year-long follow up.

You know what their primary challenge has been? (Mine too.) Not getting sucked into the Mainstream Mentality,   the way “Everybody” thinks, responds, and sees the world.

Sacred Success requires a radically different mindset…because it has a radically different goal.  Mainstream is heading for Mediocrity. Sacred Success is going for Greatness.

One of the biggest differences is how each camp views difficulties.

To the masses, problems are at best annoying distractions, if not dreadful disasters, setbacks to surmount as quickly as possible.

In Sacred Success, however, all problems are considered pathways to Greatness, pointing the way to pursuing your purpose.

Instead of struggling to overcome the obstacles, Sacred Success surrenders to every situation, looking for the lessons embedded in the circumstances.

Maintaining that perspective, however, isn’t easy. The mass mentality has an insidiously intense pull that’s always at play. You need a lot of support not to succumb.

If you’re ready to play bigger than ever before… If you’re ready to be supported by a community of like-minded women…If you’re ready to experience what Maria DeCarvalho did

I left the retreat with a much clearer vision of what is possible for me.  My time with Barbara has helped me recognize doors where I thought there were only walls.”

then, my friend, you are ready for Sacred Success.

If you’re ready to find doors where there now seem only walls, join me for one of my Sacred Success Retreats. I hold one on the east coast and one on the west coast every year.   Learn more here!

The Flu, the Farm, and a Metafiscal Lesson

“Wanna make God laugh? Tell Her your plans”–anonymous

 

I haven’t blogged for 2 weeks. Hell, I haven’t done anything for 2 weeks. Except see the doctor. Who told me I had the flu…and to stay in bed.

What?? Stay in bed???  I had important things to do!!!  I had a teleclass coming up. A retreat to market.  A speech to write. An interview scheduled. Clients to coach.  I had no time for the damn flu!!!

Yet here I am, still in bed, bemoaning my fate, but too weak to do anything.

Then my mind traveled back to my last visit with my daughter, the farmer, just last month.

The week I was there, the seedlings that Anna and others had started were sprouting. It was time to plant them in the fields.  The baby chicks were now mature hens. It was time to move them to bigger quarters.

But nature had other plans. It poured. And rain was forecast for the next few days.

You can’t plant when it rains, Anna explained, because the wet fields are too fragile.  And the ground was too wet to drive the truck to the other henhouse.

Here they were, all geared up to do both. I watched in awe at what happened next. No one got uptight. No one cursed nature.  No teeth were mashing or hands wringing.

Instead, the farm owner shrugged his shoulders, and said: “Enjoy the down time.”  (What a concept!)

We found other things to do. (I say ‘we’ because, by then, I’d been recruited into the workforce.) We cleaned the eggs. We did outreach.  One woman made a delicious apple crisp. Another couple worked on a brochure. We had a scrumptious stir-fry, loaded with freshly picked veggies.

What really struck me: everyone seemed grounded in a deep sense of faith–a  respect for nature’s  timing,  a deference to forces out of their control, a trust in a higher order–that  was so strong, they were able to dispense with their plans, embrace the delays, go with the flow and enjoy the whole process….with nary a complaint.

As I remembered this scene, I immediately saw the lesson.

Instead of fighting the current, why don’t I just kick back and relish the ride…even if it feels like I’m going nowhere?

I’ve written so much about surrender in this blog (Sweet Surrender) I guess I thought it was a onetime event. But I’m beginning to see…. the Universe has its own sense of timing. Instead of trying to out-control the cosmos, I’m going to lie back, let life unfold, delight in the downtime and do what comes next. In this case, I think I’ll write a blog!

Meet Barbara Huson

When a devastating financial crisis rocked her world, Barbara Huson knew she had to get smart about money… and she did. Now, she wants to empower every women to take charge of their money and take charge of their lives! She’s doing just that with her best-selling books, life changing retreats and private financial coaching.

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