Men vs Women

Written by Barbara Huson

Note to the financial industry: women are not men. Even though advisors are tripping over each other trying to woo women’s business, they are talking to us just like they do men. Big mistake.

As Einstein once declared, “If you ask a fish to climb a tree, she’ll always feel stupid.” Same is true with money. If you try to approach finances like a man, you’ll always feel like a fish out of water.

True, money knows no gender. But women think and communicate very differently than men. Apparently, the financial world hasn’t gotten the memo.

Let me explain 3 important differences between the sexes.

It’s Time to Toughen Up!

Written by Barbara Huson

Want to know the big secret to financial success? I got it straight from the mouths of women who make six and seven figures.

If you want to play a bigger game, you’ve got to toughen up!

Toughening up means disconnecting from your Inner Pleaser and growing thicker skin.

By nature, we women want everyone to be happy with us. Successful women are no different. Almost all I interviewed confessed to a “little girl inside me who wants to be liked.”

However, success requires us to make difficult, even painful, decisions that often have negative consequences for other people.

In fact, virtually all the women I interviewed told me that their biggest regret was not making tough decisions sooner.

Receiving: A Requirement for Success

Written by Barbara Huson

There is a direct correlation between your level of success and your ability to receive.

Receiving is to our Soul what eating is to our bodies—a source of strength, nourishment, and growth. To gain the benefits from food, you must chew, swallow, digest.

So, too, there are three steps to receiving: Acknowledge, Appreciate, and Assimilate. When you don’t fully engage in each of the three steps, you starve your Soul and your finances can suffer.

Admittedly, receiving can be tricky. Many gifts come camouflaged.

Therefore to receive fully, you must suspend judgment. Nothing that happens is ‘good’ or ‘bad, ’right’ or ‘wrong,’ ‘negative’ or ‘positive.’

Finding Your Purpose (Exercise Included)

Written by Barbara Huson

In my interviews with highly successful woman—women making high six- and seven-figures–I was struck by how they all seemed possessed by an almost divine sense of purpose.

I was reminded of a quote from Joan of Arc: “I am not afraid. I was born to do this.”

That’s how a Higher Purpose feels. You must do this, no matter what happens, no matter how frightened you are, no matter how impossible it seems.

Purposes can range from the blatantly ambitious (create world peace) to the seemingly trivial (lead a simple life).

STOP What You’re Doing…NOW!!!

Written by Barbara Huson

I once read a Wall Street Journal interview with George Schultz, former Secretary of State. He recalled running into Steve Job’s wife at a party.

When he asked where her husband was, she responded: “Oh, Steve’s taking six months off to think.”

Taking time off has long been respected by creative geniuses, primitive cultures and Eastern religions.

But few in our society teach, or even encourage, this practice any more. To many, down-time is a dirty word. And I know why.

Without endless activity, we’re left with empty space. And empty space gives rise to painful feelings.

Problems Are Starting Points

Written by Barbara Huson

I had a profound revelation while interviewing successful women. Their financial achievements were invariably preceded by a financial challenge.

That’s when I realized: problems have a purpose. They’re trying to get your attention.

The place to begin is admitting what’s not working in your life. It could be anything from bankruptcy or burn out; from feeling undervalued or overworked; from getting a divorce, or desperately wanting one

No matter how subtle, how small, or how sizable and scary, your willingness to face the problem head on is the first step to breaking through it.

The Feminine Face of Power

Written by Barbara Huson

I wish men better understood the feminine face of power. I believe they are as afraid of our power as we are!

One high earner may have nailed it when she told me, “I think men are afraid that if you give a woman too much power, we’ll skewer them in public one day.”

Men need to know we’re not seeking domination for ourselves, submission from them, or any form of retribution. That’s not how we roll.

We want to share power, not usurp it. We want power “with,” not power “over.”

You Say You Want More Money, But…

Written by Barbara Huson

If intentions are so powerful, why don’t they always pan out? What if you swear you want to make more money? Your intent is sincere, your desire is strong, but try as you might, your paycheck remains paltry.

If this is the case, it’s for this reason:

You get what you want, not what you ask for.

The distinction is critical.

We all have numerous intentions. Many we aren’t even aware of. You run into trouble when your expressed goals are at odds with your unconscious desires.

When a buried intention—say, to stay safe or be comfortable—is stronger than your spoken one—to be profitable—you’ll stop yourself at every turn.

If you’re not getting it, for whatever reason, chances are, unconsciously, you may not want it. This is why the inner work is so critical.

You must dig a little deeper to make sure that…

your declared intention is an authentic reflection of who you are and what you want
conflicting intentions aren’t inadvertently impeding your progress
your intent to profit doesn’t run counter to the way you were raised, the role you’ve assumed, or the beliefs you embrace.

Can you identify the intentions that are keeping you from getting what you say you want? Leave me a comment below.

The Downside of Personal Growth

Written by Barbara Huson

Have you noticed that whenever you change, you’re sure to upset someone close to you? Usually someone who’s resisting moving forward themselves. It could be a spouse, a parent, or a friend.

It happened to me with my second husband. I was an aspiring journalist when we met, sorely underpaid, but with lots of free time. Three months after the wedding, I decided to focus on building a profitable business.

He didn’t like this ‘new me’ one bit. It eventually led to our divorce.

At first I was crushed. But when I started interviewing six-figure women for my second book, it hit me.

To go to the next level financially, I had to surround myself with people who were cheering me on, not trying to rein me in.

Where Success Hides

Written by Barbara Huson

For years, whenever my daughters felt stuck or confused, they’d always call me for advice.

“What are you most afraid to do?” I’d ask every time.

They’d tell me and inevitably I’d reply: “Then that’s exactly what you need to do next.”

They didn’t like my response, of course, but when they followed it, they always met with success.

Nowadays, they don’t even bother asking. They finally realized what every successful woman I’ve ever interviewed eventually figured out.

Success

Men vs Women

It’s Time to Toughen Up!

If you want to play a bigger game, you’ve got to toughen up!

Receiving: A Requirement for Success

Finding Your Purpose (Exercise Included)

STOP What You’re Doing…NOW!!!

Problems Are Starting Points

The Feminine Face of Power

You Say You Want More Money, But…

The Downside of Personal Growth

Where Success Hides

Meet Barbara Huson

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