I’ll never forget a conversation I once had with a former underearner. She told me that in every job she’d had, she found out she was underpaid and would always quit.

Finally, she was in a job she loved. Once again, she discovered she was making far less than a co-worker in the same position. But this time, she really didn’t want to leave.

Though terrified, she worked up the nerve and asked her boss for a raise. 

“Sure” he said, without missing a beat.

At that moment, she had a stunning realization. I’ve come to call it the High Earners Epiphany. 

Here’s a foolproof strategy for getting unstuck. You must let go of where you are to get to where you want to go.

Clinging to the security of the familiar ledge prevents us from discovering what awaits us in the future.

The ledges in our lives offer the illusion of safety, but in truth their only value is to keep us hanging.

These ledges take many forms, both concrete and intangible. They can look like unfulfilling jobs, unpleasant relationships, inappropriate goals, untrue beliefs, unhealthy habits, bottled-up emotions.

Every successful woman I interviewed who finally let go (as hard as it was), cited that single act as the springboard to higher earnings and happier times.

If success seems to elude you, here’s a guaranteed approach for finding it. Do what you don’t want to do, are afraid to do, think you can’t do.

Whenever you decide to do something different—whether it’s making more money or changing careers—success always lies just outside your comfort zone.

The only way you’ll succeed is by stretching beyond what feels comfortable to what may seem impossible. .

The ability to tolerate discomfort—doing what might not feel good, but doing it anyway—is the only path to financial success.

For us pleasure-seeking, pain-avoiding creatures, that’s a very tall order. It’s certainly not comfortable to face up to a challenge, acknowledge a problem, and it’s especially unnerving to eschew our habitual ways of handling them.

Yet, that’s exactly what’s required. The real work in raising the bar is to stop doing the same old thing you’ve always done, to try out new strategies, to ignore false alarms, to resist the urge to quit, and refuse to fall back into familiar terrain.

Which game are you playing? It’s an important question I learned from interviewing successful women.

They taught me that, in the world of work, you are either playing The Underearning Game or The High Earning Game. There’s a big difference between the two.

The Underearning Game is called Not To Lose. The goal is to stay safe, look good, and be comfortable. There’s only one rule—avoid anything that feels uncomfortable or scary.

The High Earning game is called To Win. The goal is to go as far as you can with all that you got, and when you fall down, you get back up and keep going. The only rule here—play Full Out.

Problem is, sometimes it’s hard to tell which game you’re actually playing. There are times when I swear I’m giving my all. Then later it hits me—I was fooling myself. I really wasn’t playing a true Full Out.

You’re ready. It’s time to open your own business, ask for a promotion or set stronger boundaries. You truly want to take the next step.

But you can’t. Fear, like a colossal boulder, stands in your way.

Of course you’re afraid. Fear is a normal, inevitable, reaction any time you leave the comfort of the familiar and venture into the unknown.

The goal, here, is not to eliminate fear. Because you can’t. The goal is to act in spite of it. I love how writer Ray Bradbury put it.

“Just jump off the cliff and build your wings on the way down,” he said, adding, “If you’re too cautious, you’ll miss life.”

There’s no way around it.  If you want success, there’s only one path: feel the fear, endure the discomfort, observe the resistance, and go for it anyway.

But hear this! You don’t have to do it alone. The best antidote to fear, for us women, is surrounding yourself with a supportive community.

As high earner Karen Page once told me: “Success is a social activity. You can’t do it alone. You just can’t.”  Amen to that!!

It’s precisely why I created my virtual community—The Wealth Connection—for financially aspiring women.

If you’re looking for a safe, welcoming place to talk openly, intimately, deeply about money, receive personal coaching from me, and encouragement, support & inspiration from the others, you can learn more HERE.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on how a supportive community (of lack of one) has impacted you. Leave me a comment below.